On the eve of the turn of the year, there will be a little deeper reflection about life. I started thinking about these things last night …


Someone once said somewhere that in middle age you realize you no longer know how to live this life. It is true. I don’t know anymore either. Maybe middle age really is like another puberty. You will start to rethink who you are and where you are going (more exactly where you are going than where you are coming from which was much thought about in that first adolescence.) However, it seems that there are again more questions than answers, just like at a young age. At some point, I kind of thought I knew pretty much every answers. I thought I knew how to live this life. Somehow I even little proudly thought I was wise and knowledgeable but then suddenly in my forties everything was unclear again. I was lost with myself and my life. There are, of course, many reasons for this, such as the onset of menopause but also all these experiences, especially the losses of recent years.

In Finnish the word puberty is translated ”murrosikä” which means transition age… and yes, I have really lived through the transition period now, so word ”murrosikä” is well suited to describe this time as well …

However, the biggest reason why you no longer know anything about life is, of course, life itself and the realization that one cannot really know the truth. One can only deduce something, and create one’s own views on different things but no one knows the true truth and the right answers. Life is ultimately a mystery.

It also makes you humble to realize that you never know the end of life either. One cannot know when or how it will happen. It’s easy to think that it happens when you’re old and sick, but it doesn’t necessarily go that way.

Things often don’t go the way you would have thought. Almost everything cannot be planned or controlled as you (in a certain way) probably imagined when you were young.


Every day and every year we move towards the unknown, and anything can happen at any time, like this surprising covid -19 pandemic that stopped the world and changed views on life again. Even this period of exception has been going on for two years now, and it is still going on, and no one knows when it will end.

The biggest news of the year that has been featured almost daily is still Covid. It has lately punished also Finland with unprecedented severity.

On the other hand, I think this new variant of omikron might even be a way out of a pandemic. However, it is clearly milder than its predecessors, which may predict a weakening of the virus. It may remain with us, but it will likely become like any common flu virus.

If all goes well, the coming year will be brighter for the covid, but in addition, light will also be visible in my own life but no more about it yet…

I have lived a lot in the memories of the past lately, after the loss of my family members but now let’s turn our gaze to the coming year and hope for the best. I really hope for a happier year, there have been quite a few sad ones… and…


Usually I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but now I do this one: I promise to try to LIVE more IN THE MOMENT and APPRECIATE THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE!


On Sunday night I was walking in the beautiful winter weather. There was a wonderful peace around, no one was anywhere. For once, I was able to enjoy complete silence in the fresh frost, without fear of crowds. Such night walks could be the norm.

Here are pictures of the beautiful night winter landscape. The street lights made the night sky shine bright and the trees glowed in shades of gold and silver. It was so beautiful!


With this song, I wish everyone a very peaceful Christmas time!

Take care of each other and remember to love here and now!

It may be too late next year …

and let’s all dream of a better tomorrow …

To all those who have experienced grief and lived through difficult times, I hope that the new year will blow new gentler winds into your life!


Uuno dancing… From the movie: Uno Epsanjassa (Uuno in Epsanja).

I apologize for the late release of the door. There’s just so much going in my life right now. I really don’t know how I’m going to cope with everything, but usually things tend to get organized somehow, right?!

’till tomorrow…


Another funny Christmas song by my favorite singer: Arttu Wiskari. This song was also heard in the ”Life Only” tv-program.

ARTTU WISKARI-JOULUN IHME (The miracle of Christmas)

Although the snow does not cover the ground here, we also have Christmas traditions. This crazy family meets once a year. And no one would want to go there, but if you don’t drive or fly to grandma, only the legal part of the legacy would be left on your shoulder.

That’s why everyone pulls out three days of Christmas food without a sense. And everyone tries punches in their head not just looking at their own pole.

One will hardly survive it, but it happened differently this year.


Today we’re wishing Christmas peace for once without a punch scoop. The biggest of the Christmas wonders. Although the conversation is sticky, for once everyone remembers Christmas and it is the greatest of miracles.

Uncle receives a sweater as a gift, with reindeer running across the fence but it doesn’t hide Timppa’s beer gut. Aunt throws the gift skis away but in vain removed the antabuses. Irritated, she walks along the cottage room.

Suddenly, Grandma clears the table, digs a will from her pocket. Soon my days will end and then it will rain money on you.

Grandma’s words silence the cottage, this Christmas will be the last. The Christmas spirit was found today.


Today we’re wishing Christmas peace for once without a punch scoop…The biggest of the Christmas wonders.


I heard this new Anna Abreu’s beautiful Christmas song a while ago during the Christmas season of the television show ”Life Only” and I fell in love with it right away.

The message of the song touched me especially right now as I spend my first Christmas without my big brother in my life.

Our family shrank again when my brother left and only two years after my father …

This is a Christmas carol for those who have lost a loved one and for whom Christmas is no longer the same as before.


English lyrics:

At the convenience store we carried a spruce tree

I got angry when I didn’t find almonds again

(We lost alone at home???)

Now I wouldn’t want to be home alone


so again this year I’m going away somewhere where the Christmas carols aren’t playing

When without you it would no longer be the same watching as the world bathes in colored light

wherever you are I will always light a candle for you in the shade of a palm tree

even if this longing is always involved I’m leaving for Christmas again this year

If we argued about the rules of the board game in the heat of a fireplace once more I promise I would let you win this time


so again this year I’m going away somewhere where the Christmas carols aren’t playing…

even if this longing is always involved I’m leaving for Christmas again this year ×2