LISSU JA MÄ

LISSU AND I

TIME FLIES

Has anyone else noticed after the turn of the year that it feels like if the passage of time had accelerated even more? Or maybe I’m just getting old. Time seems to pass so quickly these days that you don’t notice when morning turns to evening and evening to morning again. It feels like there’s never enough time for everything that should be done, even though I’m always busy with something, but often free time at home is spent by doing a little bit of this and that. In the end, you don’t really get much done… Some of the moving boxes (and bags) have yet to be unpacked. However, I have managed to keep this new apartment tidier than the previous one, which is something…

Of course, there have been some coincidences (as always) too, for example my phone totally broke down. After turning off my phone tried to restart automatically but it didn’t recover anymore, just flashed the restart screen. In the end, my husband forcibly removed the phone’s battery to prevent it from exploding. We then ordered a new phone, which also took some time to install. This Samsung Galaxy A33 had a really good price-quality ratio, and even an offer of 100€.

Also a large part of my free time is spent doing paid surveys. (I think I mentioned this before. The post about the topic is still in progress but it should be completed at some point.)

My mom (on the right side).

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Even Easter came and went completely unnoticed. I remember how we often used to spend Easter together with my parents and older brother. My brother would usually cook for us, as he was a good cook. So we ate, drank, and listened to music. Good memories… Unfortunately, this is no longer possible, but this year I visited my mother at the nursing home. It was also her 79th birthday on Saturday. Despite her advanced Alzheimer’s, we managed to have a fairly good conversation. She did mention my father as if he were still alive, (even though he passed away almost 4 years ago). These are the things she doesn’t remember (like my brother’s death too). Otherwise, everything went well. I fed my mother at dinner, and she ate and drank well…

Here are the lyrics to the song above. These words bring to mind me and my highschool friend ”Lissu” (which conveniently leads to the next topic). The characters may not be an exact match. However, the chorus line in the song: ”I was the shyest and the most outsider” resonates with me. As a teenager, I was quite introverted and sometimes felt lonely. It wasn’t as much of an issue in high school, but I did have still (social) anxiety and uncertainties. Additionally, I was nostalgic, just like the protagonist in the song.

LISSU AND I

As a child, Lissu had an obsession
To walk with her eyes closed on the motorway
She screamed, everyone will leave
Sooner or later, it’s true
And still, I hesitated

Under the monkey bars, Lissu held court Quoting Madonna and Bon Jovi And headbanging, she opened doors Tough camel walks, sticker pictures

And I was the shyest and the most outsider I was afraid to live and that I would die You wanted boots and an ostrich feather A riot fence and a traffic jam

And so it can be because Of late nights or wine I stayed in my dreams I clung to them Yeah o o o oo The earth circled the sun

When we were twenty, the days were easier Sometimes Lissu drank a bottle of cough syrup Scratching the carpet with a stick She yelled: oh god damn it Bring a salami toast and ”Lärvilauta” (finnish cocktail).

At forty, Lissu took her cut breasts to the paper She had a younger man They told what they had done And how they knew the snow and the trails of our country Embraced on the cover of a winter war book

And I was the shyest and the most outsider I was afraid to live and that I would die You wanted boots and an ostrich feather A riot fence and a traffic jam

And so it can be because Of late nights or wine I stayed in my dreams I clung to them Yeah o o o oo The earth circled the sun

The years passed somewhere and got sucked up Lissu got married four times, I think Retired, she left for somewhere Strange missions to the jungles I observed the seasons They were stranger than before

And at Lissu’s funeral In 2072 I had become more fragile too I had thought of a speech even though I knew I wouldn’t dare to give it They talked about factories There were some in Europe too, once Where did the years go, I lost them

And so it can be because Of late nights or wine I stayed in my dreams I clung to them Yeah o o o oo The earth circled the sun And the earth circled the sun.

Last weekend I went to Helsinki to meet my friend. On the way back on the train, I ran into a twin of another friend of mine, my highschool friend: Lissu. She was downright strikingly similar. However, I did not immediately see her directly, only through the reflection of the window, because I was sitting on the side, and the bench in front of my view covered that area, and the girl was left in the dark. However, after seeing the reflection, I stared back and forth at it many times, and I was already pretty sure that it was my childhood friend sitting there (although she did look really young. On the other hand, I had seen her a few years earlier, and even then she looked quite young. Besides, I was only looking at the reflection, which could have been deceiving). I was about to greet her and ask how she’s been, but then she got off and walked past me, and I realized it wasn’t my friend after all…

I began reminiscing about our high school days and our shared moments. I still remember how we met during the first days of school and hit it off immediately. I think I asked her something related to the lesson, and we started talking. Soon it became clear that she was also a Jokerit fan (a former Helsinki ice hockey team, now playing in the KHL), just like me (and my family). Jokerit and HIFK were competing for Helsinki’s supremacy at the time, and these two teams divided people of Helsinki into two camps. There were the Jokerit fans and the HIFK fans.

I remember how we used to write chain letters during classes, and the math teacher gave us pluses because she thought we were doing exercises. We apparently managed to deceive her well. Sometimes we also played the Snake game on our old, basic mobile phones during classes. Back then, playing Snake on those primitive mobile phones was a cool thing.

I remember how we used to follow one student boy to the nearby kiosk, to which both of us had a crush. He was so cute that we gave him the nickname: ”Teddy”.

I remember the high school cruises, in which we participated in each one, and how much fun we always had there!

I remember how we went to the nightclub (with our group of girls). Lissu was still underage (17) at the time, and none of us were old enough for that place (age limit 24). Just like that she immediately found a boyfriend, (on her first night at the nightclub) whom she later married.

I remember how I was jealous of Lissu’s boyfriend because they spent almost all their free time together. My friend didn’t have much time for me anymore. That made me feel sad…

We were like two peas in a pod in high school, but then our paths diverged. We saw each other by chance at a store years later, but even that was years ago, as it seems to be with almost everything these days. Life takes you places… I wonder how she is doing these days…

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I’m sorry for the long silence on this blog. I’m trying to pull myself together and find time and motivation to write more often! Until we write again!